bblair426

Learning Old Lessons

In 2014-2015 I was knee-deep in dealing with the consequences of my son’s actions. There were many days in the courthouse. During that time, I was also part of a homeschool community. The families in this group were people I trusted with my struggles while we kept learning the details. By the time we wereContinue reading “Learning Old Lessons”

The Look

I was in the first position at work today. It was a nerve-wracking but absolutely incredible day. After work, I took my nervous energy to Cyclebar to ride it out. On the way out of the studio, I ran into one of my favorite instructors/unbiological sisters. She looked different with her glasses on and notContinue reading “The Look”

Gratitude

The pendulum swings from side to side. It’s like a battle in my head between the extremely awesome things going on in my life for the past year and the really scary things that are bubbling just below the surface. The weird thing is that for the most part, the battle is won by theContinue reading “Gratitude”

Terrified

Life is good. Mentally, I’m in a good place. My husband and I are doing well. I am starting my career and am so happy about it. And, my health is good and improving. My life is going well and I’m terrified. In 9 days, I have to go back to the doctor and getContinue reading “Terrified”

Sitting in Awe

20 years ago, I didn’t want to live. I made plans. I found myself on my third-floor balcony imagining the injuries I could create and how to fall and not recover. I would imagine the concoctions I could take to never wake up… if I ever fell asleep (the insomnia episodes were never-ending). Today, IContinue reading “Sitting in Awe”

July Catch Up

The month of July has been a whirlwind. A couple of big things happened at the end of June that have set the stage for the month of July. Do you have a few minutes? Let’s sit and have a chat. Big thing number 1. Our foster son of nearly 1 year got to beContinue reading “July Catch Up”

Happy Pride

For the first time in my life, I celebrated Pride as an out and proud bisexual, genderqueer female. I am completely unashamed of who I am. I’m doing the things that I love to do. I’ve ended some bad patterns in my life. You might be wondering what’s changed? I have people in my lifeContinue reading “Happy Pride”

Training

For the last few months, I’ve been working out with a personal trainer. We just had our last session until school starts again… and I’m sitting here a day later in a profound state of gratitude to my trainer/friend/sister. My gains: strength on my weak side. more range of motion than I previously noticed. moreContinue reading “Training”

Life Intervened

I’m still here. My family has been going through quite a roller coaster. It’s been terrifying and fun… and I’m ready to get off. Something tells me I’m only about halfway through this ride. Our last placement stole some collectible items and as yet, we have not been able to recover the items or theContinue reading “Life Intervened”

March Check In

I’m alive… in case you were wondering. This month threw some surprises at us. 2 of our boys were reunited with family a lot sooner and by complete shock to all involved. After the caseworker explained the reasoning, I’m hoping it goes well. Our other boy’s case plan is once again delayed. So, he getsContinue reading “March Check In”