At this time last weekend, I was on a plane. I was going to Florida for the first time in seven (7) years to be with family. And, I knew that I was walking into a lion’s den.
Being the only (to my knowledge) disabled person since birth in my family means I’m treated differently. When I was younger, I understood it. There was so much I wasn’t ready for. I live thousands of miles away, so I’m not part of 80%-90% of the goings on in their lives, which I completely understand. I mean, I don’t call 90% of the time; something is happening in my life.
The time to treat me differently is long past. I’m an adult with a family and life. I’m capable of dealing with everything that life throws at me. So, if you have something to say, for both our sakes, say it. That way, we deal with it and then move on.
When I know about events and things, I do my best to show up. To expect me to show up when I’m in town for something completely unrelated to our family, without communicating with me… that’s just not fair.
The thing is, I remember that trip differently. At least from my FB posts, I felt that I was clear with my plans for the trip. What’s more, nothing was said until they found out I was coming last weekend. Even then, they didn’t speak to me.
I love my family regardless. When I can show up for you, I will. Hopefully, in the future, I will be geographically closer to all ya’ll to make showing up more frequent and easier. In the meantime, we know better… let’s do better.
I wish that we could’ve come together on this trip, but the tension was palpable, and after the trial, I’m not about letting that in my life.
I hope that we can put the past in the past and come together for the next generations. We deserve healing. We deserve peace.
Indomitable Bellatrix 